Since then i began to understand how every little decision we made proves how much we learn about anything.
I involved in some projects lately, i wrote a children's book, i took a part as photographer in Jeremy Blincoe's opening exhibition in the gallery i volunteer, and got a chance to be part of Hitz247 radio as a photographer. Yet i've been ditched a lot of people as i couldn't manage my time and especially myself. I faced few difficult situations lately about my life and people around me. I feel lonely somehow, i miss home. I miss everyone back home that make me feel like am being loved.
Melbourne is so depressing.
So many questions so many thoughts that floating around in my mind yet i haven't got the answers. I do feel that something is missing inside me. I barely know my self.
The other thing, as i found a guy who i feel comfortable with, things just don't go easily. This 'love' thing becomes hassle for me, i choose to not feel anything right now. I don't like to put my expectation high to this person as i like him so much. How can i love thing that i never see?
Today i finished all of my school projects for this trimester. I feel like the weight that i've been carried lately just simply disappear and it is good to feel good again without any reason :) Even if i decided not to go home this winter break, i've already booked a flight to Wellington, New Zealand for next month to see my baby and pure, i'm going to be a backpacker this time. Sounds bit scary for me as i never arranged my trip alone. Anyway who knows good thing might happen next?
So I keep remind myself to be gratitude of what i have now, and enjoy every moment i have. Leave all the bullshit and go on because life is just simple like that.
Cheers,
Nadine.
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