My usual hours where i usually get trapped in my thoughts, i just can't deny that as i grow older there's so much going on in my head. By the way i'm trying to get use to with my life (again) i know this sounds strange but i'm trying to enjoy being myself now, do things that i wanna do, wear clothes that i love to wear, listen to one song thousand times till i get bored to it. Melbourne's weather such a bitch lately. They're not only getting on the winter but also raining all day and it is freaking cold i barely feel my fingers while typing this.
I've my head thinking about past years i've been through.
I miss the good old days, i do. I miss everyone that has left marks on my life back in past years. I went through old notes and old photos tonight and sigh.... i feel like i'm floating away far from everyone.
The fact that i've been living so far away from my family, i get worried little by little with whats going on back home. I realised now that family, or anyone that i consider as my family, are truly my unconditional love. I love them beyond anything, by the words that i can't describe.
To me, asking such a simple question to them like, "are you happy?"its a form of love that i can show, where they got slightly confused with my question and asked me back, "why are you asking such question?" and i was like, "no, i just want to make sure you are really happy."
I know i'm being such a melancholic bitch right now but i'm terribly homesick i cry a lot. Most of the time i'm afraid of losing my parents, i just can't imagine how bad i could be and how bad the pain would be. I know i shouldn't think about this but i just simply can't ignore them. How it's haunting me day to day i'm powerless.
I hope you're happy anytime, anywhere. I miss you all.